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In his photo, he appears to be a New York City firefighter. He appears to be a hipster. He appears to be bald.

If you listen Looking for a lady some fun now reports about online dating, you might think that romance has returned to screens, just in time to save singles from the loneliness of quarantine. The New York Times, always a great champion of technological encroachments into the dating space, has run articles about how online dating is going great in lockdown, while the Washington Post ran a romcom-style piece about video dates, which ended with an IRL kiss.

In real real-life, however, straight women seem to be more than a little bit unnerved by the frequency with which they are seeing straight men on dating sites suggesting they meet up, hook up and carry on with business as usual, despite the threat of contagion.

The kicker? And he said it. Who knows if he was lying.

And then when I refused to invite him over he asked me to send him nudes. I also have clean, unused face masks. What a prince!